What to say to a good looking woman?

I am growing more and more preplexed about the women’s movement. Having grown up in the 50’s and 60’s, I have witnessed a staggering evolution of our society’s perception of females. Yes, I agree that women should get equal pay and all the benefits that men have received for a long time. World War II proved that women could do most any job that men did. Without the female workforce, we would have lost the war! Everyone agreed with the need for women to work during the war, but when the men returned and the ladies were asked to return to their house-keeping jobs, conflicts ensued. It is not hard to imagine that males were threatened by this new competition in the work place. Because men are not generally allowed to admit that they could be threatened by a women’s presence, they resorted to various forms of harassment. What probably began as occasional mean remark turned into job segregation and subjugation of female employees. Add to this steaming caldron of conflict, what we now call a civil rights movement, and you have a real sticky, social upheaval!  There was much talk of revolution in this country and even the overthrowing of the government in the coffee shops and back allies during the late 60’s and well into the 70’s.  Just in case you are not following my train of thought, I think sexual harassment is totally out of place in any setting. For a long time I have said that people’s rights are protected by the constitution. It does not stipulate color, religion, sexual preference or gender. That said, let us move on.
Let’s assume a man is walking down a street when a beautiful woman approaches; what is he allowed to do or say in our politically world? Is he permitted to tell her she looks very lovely or that he likes the way she handles herself, or that he likes her what she is wearing. Apparently these things are no longer acceptable. We guys see the world from a different perpective. If a woman ever complimented us on how we look, we would puff up like a blow fish; yet, if we express our point of view, we are seen as terrible people with only one thing on our mind! This gets even more complicated when one realizes that women spend billions of dollars a year on makeup, hair and fingernail care, clothing and all kinds of plastic surgerie just so they are more appealing to opposite sex.  Most women today will not walk out of their house without spending an hour ‘putting on their face.’  So what is the point?  If women do not want us to notice them or to say anything to them, why then are they so preoccupied with looking good?
Many behaviors that we witness in today’s society have roots in our early developement. Obviously, cave women were aware of what attracted a male and did whatever they could to land a good breeding male so as to promote the family genes. A strong male also added increased security against aggressors of all kinds. At that time a male was not selected by the female based on the number of cylinders his car had but on his ability to increase the odds that the next generation would survive. Modern behavioral scientists have done much experimentation on what factors are involved in the selection of a mate but are still a long way from fully understanding the process. Much of their work is done observing animals to try to make the subtle connections to us. I have read a number of studies dealing with the attraction of the sexes but I would have to say that they are weak at best.
As usual, I have a theory on this matter. Although I do not partake in the whistling and comments when a attractive woman passes by me, I still feel the urge to say something to gain her attention. That is because I am a male, genetically programmed to seek out potential mates! Hopefully, I am in control of my actions, and my display of interest will be rather superficial in nature. Our society has become so paranoid and proper that we are not allowed to react or behave in any way like we have for the last several million years; we have become overly civilized. We have come a long way; in earlier times a female walking alone might be considered a viable mate and worthy of courting. However in today’s world, any misconstruded action could possibly bring the cops running in response to a screaming female.
Yes ladies, you have it tough, but we males have are own problems as well. Courting a female in our society is a complex andat times a frustrating ordeal,  sumed up well by the old adage, “Dammed if you do, dammed if you don’t.”  Some women like aggressive men while others preferr passive men…….. For the single man, trying to find a suitable woman is a Pandora’s box of emotions capable of fracturing his confidence without the slightest warning. I would love to write more on this subject but I am heading to the mall to sit and watch the women walk by while my wife shops….Sue, where are my sunglasses?

I’m the boy with the pork chop hung around his neck.

 

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About 8 weeks ago I hurt my shoulder lifting an 80 lb. bag of mortar.  Since that time I have been unable to swim so I decided to run every evening I could.  Since I am old, I limited my runs to either 2 miles, 3 miles or 5 miles with the 2 miler being the most frequent run and a 5 miler once a week. Living with us is a massive dog by the name of Vader who I refer to as Invader .  Vader is overweight, tapping in at about 155 lbs.  Because of his excessive weight, it occurred to me that he should run as well.  The first day went OK with the dog staying with me most of the way.  The next day he fell back and about half way through the run he turned back.  I was a little upset with this lazy dog but I kept running alone.

After about a week I decided to try a trick to get the dog to run with me again.  Vader’s weakness is his stomach which is rather large and hanging low.  In order to maintain his obese state he must eat whenever and whatever he can get to.  With this piece of knowledge I planned my strategy.  Dressing up in my winter running clothes, I opened the front door to displayed a large dog bone which excited Vader to utter madness.  After Vader saw the dog bone, I place it in my coat pocket.  I now have a very loyal running companion!  After I have run half way through my run I give him half of the bone and allow him to watch me place the remaining half in my pocket.  At the end of the run I give him what remains which makes him very happy.  So, now you know why I refer to myself as the boy with the pork chop hung around his neck.